23 Dec An Important Holiday Message From Kirk
Christmas is a time of happiness and good cheer, and at the end of the day, WHO wants to see Santa in a ‘horrorble’ compromising position??? No-one… except for you and me of course! So how better to shred that up than by putting on a good Christmas horror film, one like Silent Night Bloody Night – which came out in 1972 and was particularly great, as well as being a ‘first’ in the genre.
It was even before the mighty Black Christmas (which was the first of this genre for many) another of that type of Christmas movie that had the same general plot line of a mad, crazy guy who has just ‘escaped’, or just happens to be a crazed murderer who happens to have an extreme change of heart during the holiday season, goes out in their Santa suit and terrorizes the neighborhoods in their jurisdiction! As you do. And check it out – Silent Night Bloody Night stars Mary Woronov, Candy Darling and features a whole gang of characters from the Andy Warhol set. Lloyd Kaufman is great too, he did Troma, and it kinda had its main run back in the day at drive-in-theaters, which is pretty damn cool.
What doesn’t count in my personal frame for Christmas horror is anything which includes Jack Frost and Abominable snowman, or snowman-themed, stuff. Another movie I get asked about at this time of the year is an old favorite of mine, A Nightmare Before Christmas. The problem is though that as much as I love that movie, I tend to watch it during Halloween, and so it feels like a Christmas film seen through a Halloween lens. That’s my personal perspective.
But I have to say, continuing with Christmas horror that in A Christmas Carol (Charles Dickens) the Ghost of Christmas Past character has always been one of my favorite characters.
I love How The Grinch Stole Christmas, which was made in 1966 and is an animated classic, mainly because I get to hear Boris Karloff speak for 35 or 40 minutes, and that’s like music to my ears!
And ya know, all these Christmas films had their thing until Krampus came along. What a welcome addition to the genre, a full-on flat-out nasty and thoroughly unpleasant horror movie with real history and Eastern European culture!
I have been asked what Christmas horror film I would make if I was making one (and let’s face it, Christmas is already a bit of a nightmare for people already without a horror film) but regardless, bear with me and I will explain my idea…
…there was a new Christmas horror film that came out called A Christmas Horror Story (starring none other than William Shatner!), and at the end, there’s a scene where Santa Claus is actually battling some sort of ‘Krampus’ character! And I don’t wanna get into it and ruin the best bits, but it got me thinking that someone needs to make a movie and call it “Krampus vs Claus!” It would have to happen in Antarctica, they’d also have to get down there before it melts away. Cast? Who plays who? There is a tyrant illegitimate politician demagogue billionaire who has been Krampus all his life, I think you can guess who I mean, that guy would be perfect! As for Claus? It would have to be some senator from Vermont! Me as director? More like a referee! Special FX? Nope! It’s all about reality!
Let me close by saying I hope everyone has a really great holiday season, and please know that as I’m concerned, now is the time to step up, to stand up straight, walk tall, help each other, and not let the powers that be divide us. Because that’s what they want. And we won’t let it happen, because if we do, we become easy prey in this ever-evolving horror film we all find ourselves a part of.